I was tired of never having money to give meaningful gifts, so I hope you both accept this post, from myself (Kevin) LORD Avava of the Kingdom of Heaven.
Also thank you to New Zealand – Aotearoa for a pleasant stay. From:
Firstly, thank you to both Rowena and Jeff for inviting us to your wedding, and congratulations on finding love with each other. Now, I am aware I am a little… odd, with my work. So I will start with a disclaimer that some of us, seeing things the way we see them, get a little bored with day to day life. So as a thank you, and knowing for some time that I would, at some point, be sat on a Tennis Court for some reason or other, for you it marked the beginning of your journey together, and for me, it marked the end of my particular “service” to the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth.
To verify my identity and to thank you and your family and friends (yes, Lion of the Tribe of Judah, funnily enough like Lion Breweries where you work Ro) I have compiled some images in advance during your reception, as well as had some music videos made for you. As I said I wanted to have my FORMER personal assistant “Lorde” (Ella Marija, who leaked some private conversations we had) sing at your wedding. They have been unreachable since I sent them on a ‘soul vacation’ (this current lifetime) after a series of rather unfortunate events back in the late 1960s and early 1970s (I will not go into that here as none of us like to talk about it). So I have instead tricked her into singing for your wedding, as a permanent memento of your special day.
Thank you also to your friends and their lovely home, I was a little disappointed to be in New Zealand and not have any sheep to chase around, however, the food was lovely and, to be honest, that was my first real “day off” in 38 years (Heavenly Daddy has us working 24/7 365). To be honest I have had a rough year so it was a welcome break especially after some of the work I have had to finalize this year before 2020. I was looking for Jeff’s photography business to give it a shoutout, but regardless, I am glad love came to you Rowena, and thank you for singing at my own wedding some years ago.
Also to Rowena and all of your work colleagues at Lion Breweries or whatever we call it now (it’s very complicated keeping track of everything in the Kingdom) thank you, I have, how can I say… too much time on my hands, so I also had this put together. Sorry, the whole “gender” thing is a stupid security thing – hence the “Queen” stuff. Apparently the Kingdom doesn’t want me blown up by fanatics. Anyway, the PR department have finally done something right, you will have to put captions on, I used to live in South Korea for a bit, so I have substantial holdings there due to personal interest in maintaining peace. Thank you for your hospitality, your prayers, and your love for each other.
KJ (Lion of the Tribe of Judah)
Ambassador for the Kingdom of Heaven (I’m translating from my language as best I can)
P.S you all looked great in your saris:
Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.
Also to Little Ella “Lorde” and New Zealand, that’s all done, as I keep telling you Ella, I took an oath. Relax please, when is your next album coming out? Don’t stop now kid, there’s a throne with your name on it… (Image is from Auckland December 17, Goodview Apartments on Hobson St, just came to see where you’re from, I am pleased with my investment).
Good little pony Ella “Lorde” (I named you after me) – now hold onto that Crown. Ready? We might all die horribly, but it will be fun. (Photo from my honeymoon in Queenstown years ago, as I said I like everything prepared well in advance).
I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True. With justice he judges and wages war.